Ok - to start at the beginning, P had a bit of a drinking problem but it was something I thought we could work on you know? That now that I had given him a home and a family it would be enough for him?
Thursday he found out that his 2 children in the UK were taken away from the mother by social services, so he started drinking. Despite that we had a really great evening? Then J sms'd me to say he had left P a voice message and that the two of them were going to have issues (the blow up between them was ineveitable) Then I asked P what happened? He called J and was a downright ass. J then pitched up here - for the next hour I had to stop J tryhing to get into the house at P and P trying to get out at J. My dad was called, the cops were called. I managed to get the kids out the house and we went next door to the neighbours. I managed to get hold of P's brother and he came to fetch him.
That was the end of our relationship.
Then yesterday P came back here to get his things, I went to work. He stayed..and got drunk again. My dad was going to call the police again to have him arrested - I told my dad please can we not rather offer him help? I came here with my dad and we offered him to go with my dad to his house and that my dad would book him in somewhere for help. He said no. I told him to leave.
he left here still blind drunk.
I met J to get the kids and when I came home he was standing outside on the pavement outside my complex. J called the police again. When I went into Lems room I closed the curtains and saw P hiding in the garden behind my shed. I knew that once J left he would try come inside and I wouldnt have the strength to turn him away.
The police came and J told them to check and P was in the garden. They removed him. An hour later I got a collect call from him to collect him from the police station. I didnt go.
When Nash left another hour later he was standing outside. She came back here to get him a jacket and told him to leave and never come back.
I really do still love him. I really do. My heart is shattered right now. I packed his things this morning and it was the hardest thing I have done. If he will agree to get help I will probably take him back. He really was a super super person. He adored me and the kids and they adored him. I just really couldnt deal with his drinking anymore. Right now I feel like the poop on the bottom of your shoe for what I did last night.
3 comments:
oh girl! it really sounds to me like you did the right thing. You need to set boundries for yourself. He can be the BEST person in the world, but has a drinking problem, and until he is ready to change that....you can't let him hurt you or the kids.
hugs! I'm so sorry.
I'm so sorry this has happened. Sometimes it seems life just doesn't stop beating us up. DO NOT under any circumstances take him back. As lovely as he is, he will drag you down with him with the drink demon. You need to think of the kids. They are your family. You have enough to deal with with J. You dont need and cant cope with any more drama. He is just looking for a shoulder to lean on at the moment and you are the chosen provider. Make sure you have a hard heart (a friend) you can call if you feel that you need some help to keep sending him on his way. You might hate yourself at the moment but you will be glad in the future when you look back. If you take him back now you will end up hating him and probably yourself too. Once again, I am sorry this promising relationship has broken up. All strength to you as you go through this.
Drink is the route to all evil. Rather now than later. Move on, gurl! I know you're hurting but you need to put you and the girls first.
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