Friday, September 11, 2009

My final words to my mommy....

I know I haven't updated in a while, things have been so hectic and I haven't really been able to talk too much about my mom without getting too emotional. Please forgive the long post.

My moms funeral was on Monday, and it was a truly beautiful service! I felt so at peace afterwards...although throughout I was rather emotional - as was my dad. We were sitting in the front row and my moms coffin was right next to us, it was still unreal to it wasn't happening? I delivered a eulogy and after I spoke we played my moms favourite song - You'll never walk alone by Gerry and the pacemakers. That song will from now always be a favourite of mine.

My brother and I went to view my mom's body in the morning - I persuaded my dad not to go as I don't think he would have handled it. My mom looked so beautiful, so at peace. When she first went into hospital my dad was in such a tizz he hadn't packed anything for her - so I stopped at Woolies and I bought her new pyjamas and slippers and bath goodies. She never got to wear the nightdress I had bought - thats what we chose to dress her in in her casket. She looked so pretty.

The only friend of mine that made it to the funeral was Jeanette. I didn't see her before the service, only after. And when I saw her I gave her a great big hug and started crying. You know there were so many people there for "us" - as a family. But Jeanette was there for ME. It made such a difference! Jeanette thank you so much for caring enough for me to be there - I know how busy you are and you'll never know how much I appreciate you being there! I'll never forget that!

I'm not going to paste my whole eulogy - there were a lot of thankyou's, lol. This was what I said about my mom:

href="file:///C:%5CUsers%5CTanya%5CAppData%5CLocal%5CTemp%5Cmsohtmlclip1%5C01%5Cclip_filelist.xml">Dynamite comes in small packages is such a cliché but so apt when speaking about my mom. She was a tiny little thing but she packed a mighty punch.

My mom was so well loved by everyone, she was always the life of any function, ready to hit the dancefloor or liven up the conversation with a joke. She had an awesome, and sometimes naughty sense of humour. Even I blushed at times.

My mom was an amazing cook..boy could she cook!! She could honestly make something amazing out of the bare essentials. My mom would look at a picture in a recipe book and produce the same dish, without even reading the recipe. And often sent little bakkies of food with my dad to work for me – she knew exactly which of her dishes were my favourites. Even after the 5 years of chefs training that I had could I not make fried chicken like she did.

My mom was so artistic and creative, sewed 90% of her own clothes – she always used the excuse that nothing in the shops fitted her properly as she was so tiny..but I know she loved it. She even made my wedding dress and I was so proud to wear MY dress. That MY mom made.

Dad – you and mom were married 47 yrs - you did everything together , you were two peas in a pod. There was never a John without a Maureen. Dad I promise I am going to be there for you s much as I can. And I ask the same from your friends, to please not forget about my dad in a week, in month.

My mom was selfless. She so often went without in order for my dad, Fabian or myself to have something we wanted. Not even needed. She ALWAYS put us first, unconditionally. That wasn’t even a question in her mind. It’s just how it was.

Mom I am going to miss you so much. I am going to miss your laugh, I am going to miss our skelm smokes when you thought dad wasn’t watching, I am going to miss sharing my daughters milestones with you. I am going to miss your cooking, I am going to miss your advice. My daughters are going to miss their nana.

Mom watching you struggle those last few days was the hardest thing I have ever been through in my life. I know you are in a better place now and will always be watching over us. I promise to look after dad as well as I can. I promise to never let my daughters forget you and I promise to be the kind of wife and mother that you were – always putting my family first.

Good bye mom, until we meet again.


Corey~living and loving said...

Tanya....what a beautiful person you are. Thank you for sharing such an emotional thing with us. I'm thinking of you.

Gillian said...

I can't imagine whats its like to loose a mum. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Wenchy said...

Mel came for my Oupa's funeral and I felt just like you.

xxx Thinking of you xxx

Jenty said...

I'm glad I was there for you.

May your mom RIP :( (((HUGS))) to you

Sally said...

Tanya your words were beautiful, I am thinking of you at this very hard time.

Natacha said...

O Tanya, words I really don't have. I cried so hard now while reading your post!

((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))) to you and your family!

Anique said...

Reading this post, be sure your mum is proud of you. Hugs and love xxx

Tanja said...

Beautiful words Tanya


angel said...

Its a beautiful tribute Tanya.

Karen Daly said...

Oh Tanya, that was so beautiful to read... and she was such a gem. You have taken on so much of her.. I can tell from your heart...
love K