I am totally exhausted if I must be honest. Running two homes is not the easiest...I haven't had a weekend to myself in months now. I feel bad complaining but right now I would kill just for one weekend where I didnt have to do laundry, cooking and cleaning in two homes.
My dad is still pressurising me about moving in there. J is still saying NO. So, I am still the meat in the sandwich and quite honestly I have no idea what to do. My heart and my head are having a fight again..lol they do this quite often.
If I could choose? I wouldnt be with either of them.
My dad started counselling today with a lady I found - she seems pretty good. I chatted to her on email a bit before my dad went to see her today. Although I had suggested to my dad two weeks ago he go see someone..he said No. His best friend AND sister suggested it, he said NO> My brother calls and suggested it - he says to me "Your brother speaks a lot of sense, he suggested I go see someone so I will" *rolls eyes* lol.
He is still not doing well at all. He calls me 6/8/10 times a day in tears because something reminded him of my mom. When I am at his house on the weekends he cries constantly and keeps saying he can't live on his own. A part of me wants to shake him and tell him that he CAN do it, that he needs to stop thinking he can't - but hopefully the therapist will help him with that.
I know my blog has been about nothing else over the last two months, but quite frankly there is nothing else going on right now that I can blog about..lol. Hopefully that will change soon!