It’s finally over.

(Names used in this post are fictitious)

The friend I spoke of on my first post confirmed today that amends are not to be made.

We have apparently “grown in different directions”

Grown in different directions?? WTF does that mean?

How do two people that have shared everything over the last five years, just all of a sudden, overnight, “grow in different directions”??

I am truly devastated. I feel as if I have lost the love of my life. I know that sounds overly dramatic but I am heartbroken and I do not know how to cope with this.

Our daughters were the best of friends. I don’t know how I am to explain to my daughter how she will never ever have “Susie” over for a play date.

Or how she will never ever go to “Susie’s” house for a sleep over.

She cried in the car last week about how she missed “Susie” and I tried to console her by saying that its ok, myself and “Jane” will sort it out.

But it is not to be.

You know, “Jane” was meant to move abroad. I cried for two days. The thought of losing her was too much to bear.

Now that I have lost her…I don’t know what to do.

I have asked her, please, to just explain. If I knew what I had done I could understand. But she has not answered me.

I do have other friends. Quite a number in fact. But none as close as her and I were. I don’t even think the friends I have like me that much lol.I think maybe they tolerate me more then anything else.

I feel alone now. So alone. She was the only one person I could sms, call or email when something good or bad happens to me.

I now pick up my phone without thinking and then stare at it blankly.

There is no-one now.